A Parody of "Cartoons" by Chris Rice

"I was thinking the other day, what if nursery rhymes got married?
They'd be living their days in a whole new way:"

Our Life As A Nursery Rhyme

HE: "Paully-Wolly"
SHE: "Cindy-Lou"

HE thinks to himself:
(Georgy Porgy, pudding and pie, Kissed the girls and made them cry.
Peter, Peter, pumpkin-eater, Had a wife and couldn't keep her;) . . .

so,
Paully, Wally, Rootbeer float,(*see comment below) Threw her in a riverboat.
He put her in a strait-jacket, And there he kept her very well.

SHE:
Row, row, row your boat--Gently down the stream
Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily, Life is but a dream.

HE:
Oh my Cindy Lou’s such a maiden fair,
Singin' Paully Wolly Doodle all the day,
With her curly eyes and her laughing hair.
Sing Paully Wolly Doodle all the day.

HE: Little maid, pretty maid, whither goest thou?
SHE: Down in the meadow to milk my cow.
HE: Shall I go with thee?
SHE: No, not now. When I send for thee, then come thou.

SHE:
Goosey, goosey, gander, Whither shall I wander?
Upstairs, and downstairs, And in my lady's chamber.

HE:
“See-saw, Marjory Daw,” you shall have a new master,
You shall have but a penny a day, Because you won't work any faster.

SHE: Paul, “Tommy Tucker”, sing for your supper.
HE: What shall I sing for? SHE: White bread and butter.
HE thinks to himself: (How shall I cut it without any knife?)
SHE thinks to herself: (How shall he manage without any wife?)

SHE: Paully, put the kettle on, Paully, put the kettle on,
Paully, put the kettle on, And let’s drink tea.
HE: Cindy, take it off again, Cindy, take it off again,
Cindy, take it off again, They’re all gone away.

HE: Cindy, Cindy, quite contrary, How does your garden grow?
SHE: With silver bells and cockleshells, And pretty maids all in a row.

“Punch and Judy” fought for pie; Paul gave Cindy a knock on the eye.
Says Paul to Cindy, "Will you have any more?"
Says Cindy to Paul, "My eye is too sore."

HE: So I'd like to know where, you got the notion…
Said I'd like to know where, you got the notion…
to rock the boat, don't rock the boat baby
rock the boat, don't tip the boat over
rock the boat, don't rock the boat baby… DON'T ROCK THE BOAT, DEAR!

HE:
Don't rock the boat dear… Keep our love afloat dear
Strike that happy note dear…We're not lost at sea

SHE:
Keep our love ready…And never high or heady
Always keep it steady…The way it ought to be

BOTH:
Even though we're out in deep water
We must save the future for sons and daughters

SON:
What are little boys made of, made of?
What are little boys made of?
"Snips and snails, and puppy dogs tails;
And that's what little boys are made of, made of."

DAUGHTER:
What are little girls made of, made of, made of?
What are little girls made of?
"Sugar and spice and all that's nice;
And that's what little girls are made of, made of."

SHE:
Up to now we sailed through every storm
but I've always had your tender lips to keep me warm
oh I need to have the strength that flows from you
don't let me drift away my dear, when (your) love can see me through.

BOTH:
Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily … Life is but a dream!


* Rootbeer float: what we had on our first date!